It's epiphany time!

Anyone who reads anything I write knows that I love epiphanies; those moments of sudden revelation or insight when it seems like a lightbulb goes on in your head. They always change my way of thinking and my way of doing life. I had an epiphany last week and it had to do with this little guy right here, Isaiah Cedric.  

Every Wednesday our three grandchildren who live in this area have an all day visit with Gramma. It gives me time with them, as well as giving their Mommy a break and time to do a part time job that she does. It has always been a very special time for me and I love it. It is no hardship in any way. 

But I will not deny the fact that as you add more kids to the mix it gets much harder to spend the kind of time with each one of them that I would like. At one point last Wednesday "Little Man" asked me if we could do something and I found myself getting impatient and telling him he was going to have to wait. I looked down just in time to see something that I hope not to see again; this sweet wee face, sighing with a way too patient look for a tiny boy, that said, "Gramma doesn't have time for me right now." I realized something in that moment, and this is the epiphany. I do not want this little boy to miss out on having the same experiences with Gramma that the other two had. But because of the pressures of having three rather than two, or one, I had let things slip. Even our morning ritual of making eggs with our own home grown eggs had faltered. That was one of our constants, teaching Hunter and then Jordy to crack, mix, season, and then cook their eggs. Of course I did it with Isaiah but many times it would end up Gramma just making them all to get it done faster. 

We also have always sung goofy songs like when we made up the song, "We're Hangin' Grampa's Underwear On The Line" one day when they were kind of driving me crazy for something to do. Last week Isaiah started to sing it as I was hanging clothes up and I found myself not joining in and thinking, I have to get this done and move on to the next thing!  

Well, no more! This week marked the re-beginning of investing myself back into Isaiah just like I had the other kids. I don't want him to miss out on all the fun goofy things we have always done just because he is the youngest and the older kids might not be into certain things anymore. Isaiah needs all those character-building and wonder-inspiring adventures with Gramma that Hunter and Jordy had. 

It is true that a grandparent is not the parent. They do not have the rights and privileges that the parent has. They do not call the shots and it is inappropriate for them to butt into family affairs as if they do. But...that does not mean that grandparents are nobody! They can fill a very important role in a child's life, as well as being a great relief for busy, over-stressed parents at times. They can be buffers, validators, and encouragers. They can fill holes that no one else can. Just as a grandparent cannot fill a parent's shoes, a parent cannot fill a grandparent's shoes. Same with friends, teachers, brothers and sisters, whatever. We all have our roles, and I believe a child's life will be the richest when we all play out those roles as much as it is possible to do so. 

One of the problems is that I got to trying to do too much on the day the kids came, where in the past I always dropped everything on Wednesday's and spent that time with them exclusively. One of the aspects that is supposed to be a good thing in a child's life is that grandparents can slow down enough to shower them with time and attention. It's one reason we reject my going out and working a full time job; for us, these children are more important than a bit of extra money. If we can make it work then we want to do that.

So! This morning was "new leaf" time. We cracked eggs, washed dishes, sang funny songs, walked in the woods, caught frogs, and petted kittens. And the happiness I see on their young faces is worth every sacrifice on my part. They are my eternal rewards. They are my bankroll of happiness and contentment. They are the things that last and matter.